Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Hobos for Christ and Fast Food Religion

So M2 and I are driving down the road, heading for dinner, and walking down the sidewalk are these two guys. And as we pass them, we realize one is carrying a cross. A giant, wooden cross. On his back. Like some sort of giant Jesus hobo stick. And he's just smiling and chatting away to his buddy, like he's carrying a backpack or something, no big deal, just walkin' down the road, carrying a six foot tall cross.

All I could think was, who does this? Where was he going? Did he make it at home and need to deliver it somewhere? Does he run some sort of crucifix delivery program? Door to door giant wooden cross salesman? It was an unusually warm day out, did he think he'd get some exercise, enjoy the sun, take the cross for a walk? Maybe he was starting a mobile church? He didn't seem like he was trying to accomplish anything with it, other than maybe transporting it from one area to another. He certainly didn't appear unhappy or worried, so I'm guessing he wasn't preparing for his own crucifixion.

It reminded me of a sign we saw the other day, something about a drive-through at a Catholic church. I can't remember the details, but I seem to remember it was some sort of confessional type thing. We instantly tried to create some sort of catchy signage for them:

Come try Our Lady of Perpetual Motion's
Drive-Through Confessional!
Penance and a Latte - for the Catholic on the go!

Is this particular to our part of the country, or are these things popping up everywhere now? Has anyone else seen people walking around with giant crosses? Are the boys in black pants and white shirts no longer doing their thing? Are many churches starting up their own drive-through confessionals? I am certainly not current in the latest religious fads, so maybe this is happening everywhere?

I tried to Google it, but "drive through confessions" just brought up a lot of links about people feeling guilty about their crappy fast food choices. There were also some people confessing their guilt to attempting to KILL US ALL by texting behind the wheel. As we speak, people may now be feeling forgiven for attempted vehicular manslaughter because they swung through the drive-through and confessed while waiting for a half-caf soy mocha latte. Great. Just great.

No good will come of this, my friends. No good at all.

1 comment:

sixgables said...

Okay. Now I'm really glad you came by. Except that I've now expelled coffee through my nose, which does at least beat a neti pot.