Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Christmas = Junk Food or Calling Your Friends Names on Their Birthdays

I just ran to the grocery store to buy some grazing foods for Christmas. Growing up, Christmas morning always meant bacon and cinnamon rolls, followed by junk food. Since I really never cared for cinnamon rolls, and MM and BW can live without them, we took a family vote and decided on biscuits and gravy with bacon. Totally unhealthy, I know. But somehow, it just doesn't seem like Christmas without bacon. And since we're not really 'doing' Christmas this year, I feel like I somehow need it.

Unfortunately, bacon is so not anywhere close to my goal of eating no animal products. Which, by the way, has been totally derailed by MM's company giving him not one, not two, but FOUR hams. Four. Two of which were larger than BW. I have come to the conclusion that MM's company is trying to kill us with salty, fatty animal products. Maybe it's their solution to culling their workforce? Kill employees off by undermining their goals to eat healthier? Because my willpower is nothing in the face of giant hams. Or would that be 'in the butt of giant hams'? That just sounds kind of gross....I'm not sure what part of the pig a ham is. Is there a specific part? What makes one part of the pig a pork chop, one part bacon, and one part ham? And should I really be eating it, if I can't determine where it comes from? Maybe that should be my dietary goal: don't eat it if you're not 100% sure where it came from. Since I know next to nothing about animal butchering, it would solve my avoiding most animal products, and the whole 'other natural flavors' delimna. Hmmm....


Last night was M2's 40th birthday. I celebrated it by calling her a snob. After she fed me this lovely almond lemon thing her hubby made for her birthday. I know, what's wrong with me, right?? But she totally had it coming. (Sorry, M, you know it's true.)

We have this long running, I don't know, not joke really, but conversation about how what makes us laugh is just totally different. I find silly, stupid things hilarious. She's a little more, umm, shall we say, particular. (I totally don't know whether to end that sentence with a period or a question mark. And yes, I homeschool. That's what grammar guides are for. I'm not perfect. Don't judge me.)

I love all these goofy TV shows and movies that she thinks are completely stupid. So our conversations was as follows:

M2: I saw some show you were talking about on Netflix the other day.
Me: Which one?
M2: I can't you'd recently mentioned.
Me: Was it 'How Stuff Works'?
M2: No. It wasn't anything worthwhile.

That's when I called her a snob. In my defense, I swear she wrinkled up her nose in disgust when she said my show wasn't worthwhile. Because that's what she thinks of a lot of what I watch. In her defense, my TV preferences really are the audio/visual equivalent of bacon. (Goofy TV = amusing, but has no substance, bacon = yummy, but has no nutritional value. Just in case you weren't clear on that.) She explained that what she really meant was it wasn't educational. Which I'm sure is true, it more than likely wasn't. Although I believe I am responsible for turning her on to Living With Ed. So see, not everything I watch is crap.

The whole thing just made me laugh. We are so different on so many levels. But yet, we still managed to click. Maybe because we're both transplants to this area and don't really fit in. Or because we both homeschool. Or because she has many qualities I admire, or because she's partly the 'me' I want to be when I grow up. I'm still not entirely sure what she gets out of the relationship. I'd like to think I make her smile, that I get her to be goofy with me every once in a while. Goofy is fun. You laugh a lot more when you're easily amused.

Anyway, happy birthday, M2! Thanks for being my friend.

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